“Agony! Beyond power of speech, when the one thing you want is the only thing out of your reach.”

Yes, well, that being said, STORY OF MY LIFE. I never seem to be content. Which sucks, obviously. I guess that’s the way human nature is – the grass is always greener on the other side. Right? I don’t know. I know I’m very fortunate. But at so many points in my life, I always wished I was somewhere else, someone else, doing something else. I can’t even begin to understand why. Why can’t I never be content? Not that I don’t try… Not that I actually know how to “try” to be content. Its just that, subconsciously I’m always longing for something else. Maybe I need to learn to live in the moment. I don’t know. But what I know is, I’m a very jealous person. I want to be someone else, live someone else’s life, be someone else’s friend. I must be mad. Yes, I must be. But yes, I’m a very jealous person. It’s a fact la, come on. Jealousy and discontentment – story of vanessa koh’s life, thank you very much.

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Perspectives. I know i’ve left this blog for a while. A long while. Bad of me. But just yesterday, I was just thinking about different perspectives. Blogging perspectives. I know that when some people blog, they blog as though they are transmitting important information to a large group of people – a collection of followers, who follow their blog and posts. I know that is very common amongst a lot of people/bloggers, because I see them writing stuff like “sorry guys I know its been a while” or “thats all folks, update you all soon”. And I think to myself, WHO IS THE “GUYS” OR “FOLKS”? Their friends? Strangers? Fans? They speak as though they are some celebrity updating their fanbase. Well, thats just the way I see it. While others, I’ve seen, write their blog as though the “blog” is someone. In the “dear diary, today I went to school” sense. As though they are talking to a friend, an online friend of some sort, called “blog”. That seems a little more understandable to me. I mean, afterall, a blog is a form of an online diary. But personally, I find that when I write in this blog, I am basically transcribing my thoughts directly onto a platform. It is as though I am talking to myself; allowing that voice in my head to really voice out. Yes, often I feel that blogging makes me seem like I am talking to myself. In writing. Does that make sense? Its like questioning myself in a rhetorical manner, and yet being able to reread it and ponder over it again and again. Does that make sense? I do not know. I really do not know. Yes, so basically this chunk of blabber is just me talking to myself. Yes, that is exactly what I do on this blog. Right?

“Agony! Beyond power of speech, when the one thing you want is the only thing out of your reach.”

Yes, well, that being said, STORY OF MY LIFE. I never seem to be content. Which sucks, obviously. I guess that’s the way human nature is – the grass is always greener on the other side. Right? I don’t know. I know I’m very fortunate. But at so many points in my life, I always wished I was somewhere else, someone else, doing something else. I can’t even begin to understand why. Why can’t I never be content? Not that I don’t try… Not that I actually know how to “try” to be content. Its just that, subconsciously I’m always longing for something else. Maybe I need to learn to live in the moment. I don’t know. But what I know is, I’m a very jealous person. I want to be someone else, live someone else’s life, be someone else’s friend. I must be mad. Yes, I must be. But yes, I’m a very jealous person. It’s a fact la, come on. Jealousy and discontentment – story of vanessa koh’s life, thank you very much.

----------

Perspectives. I know i’ve left this blog for a while. A long while. Bad of me. But just yesterday, I was just thinking about different perspectives. Blogging perspectives. I know that when some people blog, they blog as though they are transmitting important information to a large group of people – a collection of followers, who follow their blog and posts. I know that is very common amongst a lot of people/bloggers, because I see them writing stuff like “sorry guys I know its been a while” or “thats all folks, update you all soon”. And I think to myself, WHO IS THE “GUYS” OR “FOLKS”? Their friends? Strangers? Fans? They speak as though they are some celebrity updating their fanbase. Well, thats just the way I see it. While others, I’ve seen, write their blog as though the “blog” is someone. In the “dear diary, today I went to school” sense. As though they are talking to a friend, an online friend of some sort, called “blog”. That seems a little more understandable to me. I mean, afterall, a blog is a form of an online diary. But personally, I find that when I write in this blog, I am basically transcribing my thoughts directly onto a platform. It is as though I am talking to myself; allowing that voice in my head to really voice out. Yes, often I feel that blogging makes me seem like I am talking to myself. In writing. Does that make sense? Its like questioning myself in a rhetorical manner, and yet being able to reread it and ponder over it again and again. Does that make sense? I do not know. I really do not know. Yes, so basically this chunk of blabber is just me talking to myself. Yes, that is exactly what I do on this blog. Right?