"不要对一个人太好，因为你终于有一天会发现，对一个人好，时间久了，那个人是会习惯的，然后把这一切看作是理所应当，其实本来是可以蠢到不计代价不顾回报的，但现实总是让人寒了心。其实你明明知道，最卑贱不过感情，最凉不过是人心。" - 刘俊葳 Jeffrey Low

There is so much truth in this; be nice, and often people will just take you for granted. I often try to be nice to people. I perfectly understand the benefits of doing so, and I really do try my best to treat everyone equally, with respect and humanity and kindness. I try not to be judging and stereotypically, though it is (in a way) inevitable at times. Of course, there are a pretty large handful of people that I meet whom I really connect seem to click with at all. So it is incredulously difficult to be nice.

Then again, there are that other handful of people whom I do like, whom I appreciate. And naturally, I will want to be nice to them. This is where the above mentioned issue comes in. When you are too nice to someone, or perhaps it might not be evident, they begin to take the amicability of your relationship too lightly. They start to believe it comes cheap, it comes easy. They neglect the heart and effort the other party is contributing to make things work well. By this, I am referring to all sorts of relationships, far beyond mere romantic relations, but family, friends, colleagues, acquaintances. People. Relationships between people.

Maybe there really is a line between selfless giving and obligatory giving. I have never ponder of this extensively before, for I believe in giving and offering support without intention of receiving anything in return, whenever and to whoever. Of course I am not that generous and open-hearted to be able to do so to every single person there is, that I know. But to those that I do, I have probably never harboured the desire to obtain any benefit from being nice and good to most people. At least not consciously and intentionally; discounting that nasty streak which may interfere occasionally.

For example, I enjoy watching and supporting people's show, buying and appreciating people's work, raving about people's performance, getting other people to support the works of these artistes. I do not get anything in return, I do not want anything in return. It just makes me happy. It makes me happy to be nice. I mean, everyone likes to be appreciated. But if my appreciation is being appreciated, that is another story.

You're not good, you're not bad, you're just nice.

----

I personally strongly believe, it takes two hands to clap, it takes two. To me, a relation is a connection; something take joins and links two different parties. One cannot form a connexion on his own. And for these intangible, impalpable bonds to remain strong and unfaltering in the face of adversity, both involved must be committed and they both have to work at it. It is not easy.

I never understood the intricacies of inter-personal relations. I have reiterated this known fact countless of times. But truly, I do not understand why people will want to develop more complex and conglomerate relationships on top of the contrastingly simple and ever-present ones we all encounter on a daily basis, in our lives. Convoluted ties are wholly incomprehensible to me. Why can't people survive on their own? Why is it necessary for one to have another around, to accompany them for the "last leg of their lives"? Why is dependency sometimes viewed as more preferable then independency?

I do not see anything wrong with being alone. I do not see any problem in living alone. I do not see any issue in self-reliance. There is nothing wrong with embracing interdependence, but why can't some people even spend that tiny amount of time alone? Why is the concept of "feeling lonely" so loosely thrown around nowadays? When is one truly lonely?

But is it possible, when one feels "lonely", it is a lousy excuse for them to exhibit on of the deadly sins of being greedy. The want to rob another of their time, of their presence, just to have someone else around them. That hunger to steal company, that want to feel enveloped in people-presence, that need to bask in attention – to feel loved. Is it not greed? To want someone else's company so intensely when you can be self-sufficient, is that not rapacity? To devour someone else's precious time, just because you need them around, is that not edacity? You eat and consume someone else's energy and attention, just to soothe your own demand, to ease your sense of "loneliness". To seek solace in someone else, just to escape from your own personal torment. Is that not taking advantage of that other someone? What do they get out of it? To lessen their own 'loneliness' at most, if it is not nothing.

I am not cold. I just do not see the need to crave so much for company. One will not perish just because of solitude. Maybe some people simply require more attention than others. I do not know. I possess not the maturity to simplify and understand. But I am contemptuous towards over-reliance and excessive NEED for company – it is disgusting, weak and unnecessary more often than not. Just no. Then again, who am I to speak? Loneliness is something too obscure to me.

Perhaps loneliness is not the passing cloud it is scarcely fathomed to be, but instead, something that is omnipresent and always around, and it is merely the few moments bypassing this cloud that appears significant.

And now I'm all alone again nowhere to turn, no one to go to
Without a home without a friend without a face to say hello to
And now the night is near, now I can make believe he's here

Sometimes I walk alone at night when everybody else is sleeping
I think of him and then I'm happy with the company I'm keeping
The city goes to bed, and I can live inside my head

"不要对一个人太好，因为你终于有一天会发现，对一个人好，时间久了，那个人是会习惯的，然后把这一切看作是理所应当，其实本来是可以蠢到不计代价不顾回报的，但现实总是让人寒了心。其实你明明知道，最卑贱不过感情，最凉不过是人心。" - 刘俊葳 Jeffrey Low

There is so much truth in this; be nice, and often people will just take you for granted. I often try to be nice to people. I perfectly understand the benefits of doing so, and I really do try my best to treat everyone equally, with respect and humanity and kindness. I try not to be judging and stereotypically, though it is (in a way) inevitable at times. Of course, there are a pretty large handful of people that I meet whom I really connect seem to click with at all. So it is incredulously difficult to be nice.

Then again, there are that other handful of people whom I do like, whom I appreciate. And naturally, I will want to be nice to them. This is where the above mentioned issue comes in. When you are too nice to someone, or perhaps it might not be evident, they begin to take the amicability of your relationship too lightly. They start to believe it comes cheap, it comes easy. They neglect the heart and effort the other party is contributing to make things work well. By this, I am referring to all sorts of relationships, far beyond mere romantic relations, but family, friends, colleagues, acquaintances. People. Relationships between people.

Maybe there really is a line between selfless giving and obligatory giving. I have never ponder of this extensively before, for I believe in giving and offering support without intention of receiving anything in return, whenever and to whoever. Of course I am not that generous and open-hearted to be able to do so to every single person there is, that I know. But to those that I do, I have probably never harboured the desire to obtain any benefit from being nice and good to most people. At least not consciously and intentionally; discounting that nasty streak which may interfere occasionally.

For example, I enjoy watching and supporting people's show, buying and appreciating people's work, raving about people's performance, getting other people to support the works of these artistes. I do not get anything in return, I do not want anything in return. It just makes me happy. It makes me happy to be nice. I mean, everyone likes to be appreciated. But if my appreciation is being appreciated, that is another story.

You're not good, you're not bad, you're just nice.

----

I personally strongly believe, it takes two hands to clap, it takes two. To me, a relation is a connection; something take joins and links two different parties. One cannot form a connexion on his own. And for these intangible, impalpable bonds to remain strong and unfaltering in the face of adversity, both involved must be committed and they both have to work at it. It is not easy.

I never understood the intricacies of inter-personal relations. I have reiterated this known fact countless of times. But truly, I do not understand why people will want to develop more complex and conglomerate relationships on top of the contrastingly simple and ever-present ones we all encounter on a daily basis, in our lives. Convoluted ties are wholly incomprehensible to me. Why can't people survive on their own? Why is it necessary for one to have another around, to accompany them for the "last leg of their lives"? Why is dependency sometimes viewed as more preferable then independency?

I do not see anything wrong with being alone. I do not see any problem in living alone. I do not see any issue in self-reliance. There is nothing wrong with embracing interdependence, but why can't some people even spend that tiny amount of time alone? Why is the concept of "feeling lonely" so loosely thrown around nowadays? When is one truly lonely?

But is it possible, when one feels "lonely", it is a lousy excuse for them to exhibit on of the deadly sins of being greedy. The want to rob another of their time, of their presence, just to have someone else around them. That hunger to steal company, that want to feel enveloped in people-presence, that need to bask in attention – to feel loved. Is it not greed? To want someone else's company so intensely when you can be self-sufficient, is that not rapacity? To devour someone else's precious time, just because you need them around, is that not edacity? You eat and consume someone else's energy and attention, just to soothe your own demand, to ease your sense of "loneliness". To seek solace in someone else, just to escape from your own personal torment. Is that not taking advantage of that other someone? What do they get out of it? To lessen their own 'loneliness' at most, if it is not nothing.

I am not cold. I just do not see the need to crave so much for company. One will not perish just because of solitude. Maybe some people simply require more attention than others. I do not know. I possess not the maturity to simplify and understand. But I am contemptuous towards over-reliance and excessive NEED for company – it is disgusting, weak and unnecessary more often than not. Just no. Then again, who am I to speak? Loneliness is something too obscure to me.

Perhaps loneliness is not the passing cloud it is scarcely fathomed to be, but instead, something that is omnipresent and always around, and it is merely the few moments bypassing this cloud that appears significant.

And now I'm all alone again nowhere to turn, no one to go to
Without a home without a friend without a face to say hello to
And now the night is near, now I can make believe he's here

Sometimes I walk alone at night when everybody else is sleeping
I think of him and then I'm happy with the company I'm keeping
The city goes to bed, and I can live inside my head